So, as I mentioned, I'm going through a midwife rather than a regular doctor. I will be having an all natural birth at her home birthing center [and most likely will be a water birth]. My midwife's name is Nora Mcneill and her assistant is Jan.
Her website is here: http://www.reddingmidwife.com/press/the-birth-gazette-1992/
She has some great links about midwifery, and all sorts of pregnancy information. Good read. =)
I've been stalking her page for a couple years now. I've always been interested in an "alternative birth" and I've always found her page to be the one I come back to. So when I finally got pregnant, she was my first call! She invited me to her home where she has her birthing center on the lower levels. Her house is amazing. We were considering an at-home birth, but once we saw her house, we realized we were more comfortable there than in our own home. She has many rooms and options of where and how to have the baby, while only being 2 minutes from the hospital for emergencies. It's a cozy clean home. Everything is prepared for a birth while being a comfortable enviroment for me, my husband, and any guests. She has a jacuzzi for labor pains, a koy pond and deck that looks out over redding for relaxation, and two rooms each set up a little differently for births. Her bathroom features a gorgeous vintage tub that is comfortable enough for a water birth [which I'm still leaving up for a last minute decision].
She has a doctor's office off of Hilltop, and we had our first appointment yesterday. She was so informative on everything. We talked about everything from organic food, to baby wraps, to circumcision. She had packets of information on everything. She sent me home with so much to read and learn. She also gave us some business cards of local businesses that will be helpful such as Country Organics, which sells local grown produce and meats. She's helping me keep a food diary, and excercise plan, as well as teaching me breastfeeding techniques and labor pain management. She's my own personal assistant and question answerer! She loves babies and families and she's one of the sweetest ladies out there. She's smart and I instantly felt comfortable with her. And unlike a doctor, she's very personal. She gets to know me and my husband [and my mom!] and makes our visits personal to our needs. She has shown me my rights as a mother, and gives me options and control over how I bring this baby into the world. I'm so excited to see where this goes. If you are considering a more natural setting for your birth, I highly recommend checking it out. It's not for everyone, and I'm by no means saying that this is the only way, or that I'm doing this the way it's supposed to be. This is my personal choice, and feel like it's the right thing for me and my family. I've never been a fan of hospitals, and I've done a lot of research on the pros and cons of this. [which I will continue to touch on in further posts] It's probably harder financially for some [easier for others], and scary. You have to put a lot of faith into God, that he will protect you and the baby, and let his plan take over. But I believe this is the best thing for me, and I'm very excited to see what happens along the way!
This blog is to keep my memory fresh on my journey of being pregnant. It's also there to keep people updated on how we are doing, and to help anyone out there who might have some of the same struggles as me. I also want to reach out to all types of families and situations. I want to teach what I learn, and help moms everywhere!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Breastfeeding.
One of the things I brought up in my last blog, was how I'm an advocate for breastfeeding. This is something that is so important to me. I was a breastfed baby, and it wasn't until I was an adult that I was truly thankful that my mom did that for me. When I picture myself as a mom, I've always pictured me looking down at my baby and doing what I was made to do-feed and nuture the baby. I've never imagined a bottle, or making formula, or anything of the sorts, I've just never thought that I would go that route. I did have a family member who had a hard tme breastfeeding. The doctor said she wasn't getting enough nutrients to the baby, and that she needed to supplement. She was heartbroken, but did it for the health of her children. So let me begin by saying, I'm not against formula completely. I think we are blessed that we've been able to create a supplement for our growing babies that can be used in emergency cases like these. There are times when we need help to make sure our babies are healthy, and a mother should do everything in her power to make sure that happens, so in the case that the child's health is better off with formula, than breastmilk, then I'm all for it. But statistically, I read it's less than 1% of the female population that will run into any serious issues with their breastmilk that can't be solved.
So, besides all the health related reasons that I'm for breastfeeding, I'm also a believer in bonding with your baby. There is no bond like the one between a mother and her infant. And while a lot of those feelings come natural, a lot of them take work. Breastfeeding is the most natural thing a woman can do. There is nothing gross, dirty, or sexual about it. Women were made to do it. God gave us breasts to feed our children and keep them alive. Just because there are alternative ways of keeping our children alive now, doesn't mean you should partake in them. So back to the bonding part. A lot of women struggle to bond with their baby after it's born. P.P. depression is a common thing. As well as just all your crazy hormones affecting your ability to focus on the relationship between you and your infant. You experience emotions of pain, happiness, jealousy, confusion, fear, ect,... and sometimes they are so overwhelming that it's hard to truely connect with your baby. This is one of the most important reasons for breastfeeding. When you are the source of life for your baby, they depend on you, love you, and appreciate you. You are working as a team to keep you and the baby healthy [yes, that's right, breastfeeding is healthy for you too!], and when you are working together, you create a bond. Also, there is so much that a dad can help with, but the thing with breastfeeding that is so empowering, is that this is the one thing that is truely made just for you and baby. This is your time alone with the baby, to learn your baby, and let your baby learn you. No one else can do this.
So, beyond the bonding part of breast feeding there are countless benefits for the baby's health, and yours. Doctors and experts recommend that the baby is breastfed exclusively for six months, after that you can add in some other solids [if you are comfortable with that], but still sticking to a breastfeeding schedule for as long as you can. The first year is ideal, and even longer if it's right for you and the baby. Breastmilk can fight/prevent many infections such as ear infections, respiratory infections, diarrhea, and meningitis. It helps build you and your baby's immune system. It helps/prevents allergies, asthsma, diabetes, and SIDs. Statistically, babies who are breastfed visit the doctor a lot less than formula fed, which also saves you a lot of money and time. Also, need I mention the cost of formula-holy cow!! Also, convenience. I personally could not imagine how much my chore list is going to grow once our baby is here, I do not want to make something as crucial as my baby's feedings more complicated than they have to be. "How many ounces?" "When was the last time they were fed" "Is this brand giving him tummy aches?" "Do we have enough money to buy another can?" "We only have enough left for one more feeding-is the store even open this late?" These are all things I'd have to worry about that, if I don't have to, I don't want to. Another pro to boobs...smarter babies! That's right, stats show that breastfed babies have higher IQs, this is because there are nutrients available in breastmilk that man can just not create in formula. Breastmilk is the purest thing a baby can have, it was created so perfectly by God himself, formula can come close, but doesn't quite make it at he top. It's like the difference of taking vitamins versus eating the vegetables that carry the pure nutrients. So one last benefit for baby that I want to touch on, is the digestive system. Because of the purity of the breastmilk, the babies digest the milk so much easier, rather than formula which sits in the stomach and can cause constipation, gas, and just an upset baby in general-which is never fun for anyone! One thing many mothers have mentioned in a pro to formula is that the babies sleep better and through the night. This is because of the digesting that I just mentioned. When we fill ourselves up with heavy foods, we sleep pretty good too, but most of the time it leads to a harsh bathroom episode, or an upset belly the next day, not too mention it stretches our stomach and we'll continue to over eat causing us to retain more fat. while our baby sleeping longer is convient, they weren't made to sleep through night. One thing that mother's have to deal with is lack of sleep. But you can do it! Women for century's have been doing it, you can too! This is just something to expect with parenthood, but there are many things to help with that. For one, nap when baby does! And also, co-sleeping can help with that too...lying the baby in the bed next to you while you feed her, can help you both rest better. Ok, there are endless benefits for the baby to you breastfeeding, now I want to touch on the benefits for mom [besides bonding and a healthier baby]. Breastfeeding helps burn calories-I'm sure I don't need to go too much more into that. Who doesn't want to squeeze back into their premommy pants? Healthier skin and bones! Your body is producing much more Vitamin D when nursing, that in the end your skin and bones benefit too! I really hope every new mom, mother to be, or woman TTC at least gives breastfeeding a chance. Sometimes its painful, tiring, or for some embarassing, but it's so worth it. I hope I gave you some new thought and something to think about. I'm not here to judge anyone who's decided against it, but I am definitely standing my ground that the pros outweigh the cons. I will later post a blog with tips, techniques, and diets for nursing.
So, besides all the health related reasons that I'm for breastfeeding, I'm also a believer in bonding with your baby. There is no bond like the one between a mother and her infant. And while a lot of those feelings come natural, a lot of them take work. Breastfeeding is the most natural thing a woman can do. There is nothing gross, dirty, or sexual about it. Women were made to do it. God gave us breasts to feed our children and keep them alive. Just because there are alternative ways of keeping our children alive now, doesn't mean you should partake in them. So back to the bonding part. A lot of women struggle to bond with their baby after it's born. P.P. depression is a common thing. As well as just all your crazy hormones affecting your ability to focus on the relationship between you and your infant. You experience emotions of pain, happiness, jealousy, confusion, fear, ect,... and sometimes they are so overwhelming that it's hard to truely connect with your baby. This is one of the most important reasons for breastfeeding. When you are the source of life for your baby, they depend on you, love you, and appreciate you. You are working as a team to keep you and the baby healthy [yes, that's right, breastfeeding is healthy for you too!], and when you are working together, you create a bond. Also, there is so much that a dad can help with, but the thing with breastfeeding that is so empowering, is that this is the one thing that is truely made just for you and baby. This is your time alone with the baby, to learn your baby, and let your baby learn you. No one else can do this.
So, beyond the bonding part of breast feeding there are countless benefits for the baby's health, and yours. Doctors and experts recommend that the baby is breastfed exclusively for six months, after that you can add in some other solids [if you are comfortable with that], but still sticking to a breastfeeding schedule for as long as you can. The first year is ideal, and even longer if it's right for you and the baby. Breastmilk can fight/prevent many infections such as ear infections, respiratory infections, diarrhea, and meningitis. It helps build you and your baby's immune system. It helps/prevents allergies, asthsma, diabetes, and SIDs. Statistically, babies who are breastfed visit the doctor a lot less than formula fed, which also saves you a lot of money and time. Also, need I mention the cost of formula-holy cow!! Also, convenience. I personally could not imagine how much my chore list is going to grow once our baby is here, I do not want to make something as crucial as my baby's feedings more complicated than they have to be. "How many ounces?" "When was the last time they were fed" "Is this brand giving him tummy aches?" "Do we have enough money to buy another can?" "We only have enough left for one more feeding-is the store even open this late?" These are all things I'd have to worry about that, if I don't have to, I don't want to. Another pro to boobs...smarter babies! That's right, stats show that breastfed babies have higher IQs, this is because there are nutrients available in breastmilk that man can just not create in formula. Breastmilk is the purest thing a baby can have, it was created so perfectly by God himself, formula can come close, but doesn't quite make it at he top. It's like the difference of taking vitamins versus eating the vegetables that carry the pure nutrients. So one last benefit for baby that I want to touch on, is the digestive system. Because of the purity of the breastmilk, the babies digest the milk so much easier, rather than formula which sits in the stomach and can cause constipation, gas, and just an upset baby in general-which is never fun for anyone! One thing many mothers have mentioned in a pro to formula is that the babies sleep better and through the night. This is because of the digesting that I just mentioned. When we fill ourselves up with heavy foods, we sleep pretty good too, but most of the time it leads to a harsh bathroom episode, or an upset belly the next day, not too mention it stretches our stomach and we'll continue to over eat causing us to retain more fat. while our baby sleeping longer is convient, they weren't made to sleep through night. One thing that mother's have to deal with is lack of sleep. But you can do it! Women for century's have been doing it, you can too! This is just something to expect with parenthood, but there are many things to help with that. For one, nap when baby does! And also, co-sleeping can help with that too...lying the baby in the bed next to you while you feed her, can help you both rest better. Ok, there are endless benefits for the baby to you breastfeeding, now I want to touch on the benefits for mom [besides bonding and a healthier baby]. Breastfeeding helps burn calories-I'm sure I don't need to go too much more into that. Who doesn't want to squeeze back into their premommy pants? Healthier skin and bones! Your body is producing much more Vitamin D when nursing, that in the end your skin and bones benefit too! I really hope every new mom, mother to be, or woman TTC at least gives breastfeeding a chance. Sometimes its painful, tiring, or for some embarassing, but it's so worth it. I hope I gave you some new thought and something to think about. I'm not here to judge anyone who's decided against it, but I am definitely standing my ground that the pros outweigh the cons. I will later post a blog with tips, techniques, and diets for nursing.
10 weeks continued
So I guess I should begin with a little background information on myself, and my husband. My name is Amber, I'm now 19, and my husband, Thomas, is 23. We live in Redding, but he is from a small town up north called Happy Camp-where his parents are currently located. I am a secretary at a local Smog & Repair shop, and Thomas is the Assistant Manager at a local car wash. We both have been at these jobs for a little over a year. He has 3 brothers, and 1 sister. I have 3 sisters, and 6 brothers. We fell in love 4 years ago, and I couldn't imagine my life without him-my best friend. We got married October 22nd, this year. We both have dedicated our lives to Jesus Christ, and we do our best to let his light shine through us. We are very excited for the rest of our lives together and with this baby.
So let me begin by saying there are some things I believe in and am an advocate for, and hope to express in further blogs. Like I mentioned, I'm a christian, and you'll probably see quite a bit of God come out in my blogs. I am not for abortion [obviously] and the more I learn about pregnancy in general, I'm hoping to help educate others. I am a major advocate for breast feeding, and again hope to educate others. I have decided to go through a midwife, and I will be doing an all natural water birth at my midwife's birthing center [which is something I'm going to touch on a lot...I want to share my experiences and my journey with others!]. I love the idea of baby wearing, cloth diapers, and co-sleeping, and again, I'll be sharing what I learn. I am not going to get any sonograms, due to risk for the baby, and I hope to educate others on that subject as well. I will not be partaking in any testing of the baby, and we are also not going to find out the sex of the baby. So if anyone reading this is thinking about going the same route on any of these things, or just want to see how it all works out, I hope you follow me on this journey.
I am a member of babycenter.com which is a great resource, so if you're TTC or expecting, I highly recommend signing up for the website. I will be posting plenty of links and articles from there, I'm sure, so standby!
So let me begin by saying there are some things I believe in and am an advocate for, and hope to express in further blogs. Like I mentioned, I'm a christian, and you'll probably see quite a bit of God come out in my blogs. I am not for abortion [obviously] and the more I learn about pregnancy in general, I'm hoping to help educate others. I am a major advocate for breast feeding, and again hope to educate others. I have decided to go through a midwife, and I will be doing an all natural water birth at my midwife's birthing center [which is something I'm going to touch on a lot...I want to share my experiences and my journey with others!]. I love the idea of baby wearing, cloth diapers, and co-sleeping, and again, I'll be sharing what I learn. I am not going to get any sonograms, due to risk for the baby, and I hope to educate others on that subject as well. I will not be partaking in any testing of the baby, and we are also not going to find out the sex of the baby. So if anyone reading this is thinking about going the same route on any of these things, or just want to see how it all works out, I hope you follow me on this journey.
I am a member of babycenter.com which is a great resource, so if you're TTC or expecting, I highly recommend signing up for the website. I will be posting plenty of links and articles from there, I'm sure, so standby!
10 weeks & my journey so far.
I've been wanting to start a pregnancy blog for a while, not only to share my journey with others, but to remember all the milestones so I can share those memories with the baby, later on.
So before I tell you about my 10 week milestone, I am going to map out what's happened so far.
Week 1-Pregnancy is measure by your last menstrual period [LMP], and so week one for me began on September 19th. One thing I'd like to note about this week-My older sister had her daughter on June 26th last year, and her LMP was also September 19th, which means our babies could share a birthday. Also, another note about this date-it was about a month before mine and Thomas' wedding. I was running around picking up plates, forks, lights, candles, tables, chairs, and making centerpieces. Thomas and I had been going through a rough time at this point, and the stress of the wedding planning and preparing for family to come into town wasn't helping, not to mention being sick from my deathly cramps I get every month, I was pretty sure I wanted to check myself into the crazy house. We got through it though!
Week 2- This week began on 9/26 and finished up on 10/3. October 3rd was the date of conception. I remember Thomas took me out to dinner to get our mind off of things. We were making up after a long week and counting down the days until our wedding. I remember laying in bed wide awake while Thomas snored next to me. I had felt that the last month or so, I had distanced myself from God, so that night I decided to spend some time talking to my old buddy upstairs. I had apologised for the time that had passed since I last talked to him, and ask for his comfort and relief from the stress I had put myself under. I asked him for a sign showing me that Thomas and I were meant to be a family, and right then my heart fluttered. I had a calming over me, and I snuggled up to Thomas and went to sleep. The next morning I told Thomas I was sure he had just gotten me pregnant. He laughed and I said I'd prove him wrong in a couple weeks! I went along the next few days with a little more gallop to my step. I had dreamt of being a mom for so long, and I just had this feeling that it was all coming true!
Week 3- My mom's birthday was on the 10th. My nipples were sore and I was bloated and tired. I decided to take a picture of my belly in her bathroom and kept my little secret to myself-because obviously I'm crazy for thinking I'm pregnant a week after it could have happened. haha. We sat around eating cake and planning the last minute things for the wedding. My mom was teasing me at my sleepiness and joked that I was pregnant. Funny how mom's know these things before they really know these things!
Week 4-A lot of family was in town, I was tired, moody, stressed, and worst of all-depressed. I lost that internal feeling of being pregnant. That excitement inside just turned to disbelief. I wasn't seeing any major symptoms, and I tried preparing myself for the worst...I wasn't lucky enough to get pregnant, and it's time to focus on the wedding and being newlyweds. But this also meant that my period was due on our wedding day-which was also a bummer. But I was so happy to get married that I put all my feelings in the back of my head and truly convinced myself that it just wasn't our time to be parents.
Week 5- Our wedding was on the 22nd. I expected my period somewhere around the 20th, but due to stress of getting the wedding set up, I wasn't surprised that it was a bit late. I had prayed that it would come sooner and get done with by our wedding night, but everyday that passed I accepted that Thomas and I weren't going to have as special of a night as planned, so I started to come up with some other ideas for our night. When the girls helped me get ready for the wedding, we joked around that my period would surely show up right as I said I do, in my gorgeous very white dress...so i prepared myself with the biggest maxi pad I could find and two pairs of underwear. After dinner, I went to the bathroom and was shocked to see that my period hadn't come. I thanked the lord and proceeded with the wedding. Finally most people had left the ceremony and all we worked for was finally over. I sat around with my brother and his girlfriend who recently became parents themself. He asked me how long we were going to wait to have kids, and then it hit me...I said well, I guess we'll find out soon. Thomas and I had gotten to the hotel and I began to have some cramping. Saddened, I asked him to go to the store and pick me up some tampons. By the time he had come back, nothing had happened, just really tired and moody, but so thankful that we got to share an amazing wedding night together. Something else I should mention about this week, the next day was my 19th birthday! We spent the day with family, mostly Mark[Thomas' brother] and basked in the newlywed, newly 19 feeling. That evening Thomas, Mark and I goofed off at the store and when Thomas asked if I needed a refill on tampons, I realized I still hadn't gotten my period, so instead we decided to buy some pregnancy tests. We got home, and I still doubted that I'd be lucky enough to actually be pregnant, so me going into the bathroom to pee on a stick was 99% just for fun. I peed on it and walked out before the results, and Thomas and Mark had surprised me with candles on one of our wedding pies! I blew out the candles and made a little wish, not realizing a lifetime of wishes had come true in the bathroom. I went back in there and two dark lines had appeared. Thomas said "that was a cheap test, maybe it's a mistake!" So I took two more tests, and immediately two red dark lines appeared on both...Tom's reaction? "So are we gonna watch a movie?" Haha, I'm pretty sure he was in shock and the idea of being a husband hadn't even sunk in, much less being a daddy. Mark immediately got teary-eyed but was in shock as well. I wanted to have my girl moment, so I called my best friend & cousin, Ashley Lee, and went in the bedroom to call her. We started crying together, and once Thomas heard the tears it became a lot more real, he ran into the bedroom and started crying and kissing me and my belly. By far the best weekend of my life.
So, the morning after I found out, I went to Rite-Aid, and bought a slightly more expensive test. I went with Mark to the store while Thomas finished up cleaning some wedding stuff. I made Mark stand by the door while I took the test into the bathroom-I couldn't wait to get home. So once that came up positive, we rushed back to Thomas, and said "it's time to spread the news" We ran to my mom and step-dad, Monty's house and gave them a present to say thank you for all the help with the wedding, they pulled out the pregnancy tests and we're shocked, but not so shocked at the same time. They knew we wanted babies soon, but the fact that everything happened all in one weekend was pretty shocking. Monty got teary eyed and mom stared at me for a few moments before she hugged me and said she was so happy! We took Thomas to work, and I called my step mom Heather next, and she screamed and cried and squealed with joy! Next Mark drove me to my sister's house. I handed her a box of tampons and said "I'm not going to be needing these for a while" she said "I sent those with you on your honeymoon, they aren't mine, you keep them!" I said "Andrea I didn't need them, and wont for a while." She said she didn't get it and giggled with confusion finally I said "I'm pregnant you dork!!" she was so happy and excited. I went in the house and told Timmy and Beckah, and they too were shocked and happy! When Thomas got home that night from work, we called his parents and when his mom answered the phone he said "Hey Grandma!" she said "This is your mom Diana, did you try calling grandma?" He ignored it and asked her how she was and what not, eventually he asked her to put the phone on speaker phone next to Dad, and he said "Hey mom, when I called you grandma, it wasn't a mistake, Amber and I are going to have a baby!" She said "Are you serious? you're not joking?" Once they realized we were serious the phone went silent. Thomas said "are you there?" Dad said "Your mom can't talk right now" Then we hear a little voice with tears behind it "You guys are just so great! I love you!" I think they were both prettttty excited! None the less we got some great reactions and everyone seems pretty happy about the baby's coming!
Week 6-It was back to work after all the wedding, birthday, and baby excitement. Due to facebook all my coworkers already knew. A couple of things I'd like to note about this week. Thomas and I picked out names [girl-Cambria Allynn Poeschel boy-Tucker Stanley Poeschel]. I began to get some serious pregnancy symptoms-sore boobs, fatigue, endless hunger, headaches, and I could feel a hard spot on my lower abdomen where the baby is.
Week 7-Hell. I was sooo sick. I was working everyday, and I got a sinus infection and some sort of flu, I was throwing up every half hour, and wanted to die. By Saturday, I had to leave work to go home because I hadn't kept liquids down for a few days.
Week 8-Flu was almost gone, but due to a cough I developed from the sinus infection, I threw out a rib, and it's been hard to breathe since. Frankly at this point, I hate being pregnant. I was miserable. I wanted the baby to be out of my belly and in my arms right then, There was no way I could do 32 more weeks of this.
Week 9-Thanksgiving week. I did get to enjoy thanksgiving, of course the next few days after that I was deathly sick. I throw up everyday, and need a nap around 3 everyday haha. My belly at this point has started to pop out and my hips have grown enough to make all my pants require that I unzip them all. My flu is gone, but my mood swings are in full swing...I hate everybody and everything. I've never been so mean in my whole life, and then the next second cry at how much I miss my mom, and then start busting up laughing because I spilled my soup on me. I feel ridiculous and not much like myself. Car rides are the worst, but I'm starting to find what foods at what time work best for me. I had to buy a new bra-my boobs are huge and swollen and sore, and new underwear-the elastic was too tight.
Week 10-here we are...all caught up. This week has been the best so far. I had my first appt with my midwife. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat, and learn so much about my body, the baby, and what's going to happen over the next 30 weeks. I'm a quarter of the way there and have so much to do! We've picked out the theme of baby stuff [winnie the pooh!], we've started looking into birthing classes, and changing my diet. My belly has continued to bump out a little, and I'm starting to feel my figure full out. But by far the best part of the week was hearing the baby's heartbeat on the doppler. I was so relieved. I was having a really hard time not knowing what was going on in my belly, and it was such a relief to know i've done something right! My HCG levels were good, and my uterus was growing at a good rate, and I've gained 3 pounds. I'm now 95 pounds!
So that's been the basics of the last 10 weeks. I am going to start a new blog tonight on things I've learned, things I'm planning, things I'm looking forward to, and some helpful advice for anyone seeking it.
So before I tell you about my 10 week milestone, I am going to map out what's happened so far.
Week 1-Pregnancy is measure by your last menstrual period [LMP], and so week one for me began on September 19th. One thing I'd like to note about this week-My older sister had her daughter on June 26th last year, and her LMP was also September 19th, which means our babies could share a birthday. Also, another note about this date-it was about a month before mine and Thomas' wedding. I was running around picking up plates, forks, lights, candles, tables, chairs, and making centerpieces. Thomas and I had been going through a rough time at this point, and the stress of the wedding planning and preparing for family to come into town wasn't helping, not to mention being sick from my deathly cramps I get every month, I was pretty sure I wanted to check myself into the crazy house. We got through it though!
Week 2- This week began on 9/26 and finished up on 10/3. October 3rd was the date of conception. I remember Thomas took me out to dinner to get our mind off of things. We were making up after a long week and counting down the days until our wedding. I remember laying in bed wide awake while Thomas snored next to me. I had felt that the last month or so, I had distanced myself from God, so that night I decided to spend some time talking to my old buddy upstairs. I had apologised for the time that had passed since I last talked to him, and ask for his comfort and relief from the stress I had put myself under. I asked him for a sign showing me that Thomas and I were meant to be a family, and right then my heart fluttered. I had a calming over me, and I snuggled up to Thomas and went to sleep. The next morning I told Thomas I was sure he had just gotten me pregnant. He laughed and I said I'd prove him wrong in a couple weeks! I went along the next few days with a little more gallop to my step. I had dreamt of being a mom for so long, and I just had this feeling that it was all coming true!
Week 3- My mom's birthday was on the 10th. My nipples were sore and I was bloated and tired. I decided to take a picture of my belly in her bathroom and kept my little secret to myself-because obviously I'm crazy for thinking I'm pregnant a week after it could have happened. haha. We sat around eating cake and planning the last minute things for the wedding. My mom was teasing me at my sleepiness and joked that I was pregnant. Funny how mom's know these things before they really know these things!
Week 4-A lot of family was in town, I was tired, moody, stressed, and worst of all-depressed. I lost that internal feeling of being pregnant. That excitement inside just turned to disbelief. I wasn't seeing any major symptoms, and I tried preparing myself for the worst...I wasn't lucky enough to get pregnant, and it's time to focus on the wedding and being newlyweds. But this also meant that my period was due on our wedding day-which was also a bummer. But I was so happy to get married that I put all my feelings in the back of my head and truly convinced myself that it just wasn't our time to be parents.
Week 5- Our wedding was on the 22nd. I expected my period somewhere around the 20th, but due to stress of getting the wedding set up, I wasn't surprised that it was a bit late. I had prayed that it would come sooner and get done with by our wedding night, but everyday that passed I accepted that Thomas and I weren't going to have as special of a night as planned, so I started to come up with some other ideas for our night. When the girls helped me get ready for the wedding, we joked around that my period would surely show up right as I said I do, in my gorgeous very white dress...so i prepared myself with the biggest maxi pad I could find and two pairs of underwear. After dinner, I went to the bathroom and was shocked to see that my period hadn't come. I thanked the lord and proceeded with the wedding. Finally most people had left the ceremony and all we worked for was finally over. I sat around with my brother and his girlfriend who recently became parents themself. He asked me how long we were going to wait to have kids, and then it hit me...I said well, I guess we'll find out soon. Thomas and I had gotten to the hotel and I began to have some cramping. Saddened, I asked him to go to the store and pick me up some tampons. By the time he had come back, nothing had happened, just really tired and moody, but so thankful that we got to share an amazing wedding night together. Something else I should mention about this week, the next day was my 19th birthday! We spent the day with family, mostly Mark[Thomas' brother] and basked in the newlywed, newly 19 feeling. That evening Thomas, Mark and I goofed off at the store and when Thomas asked if I needed a refill on tampons, I realized I still hadn't gotten my period, so instead we decided to buy some pregnancy tests. We got home, and I still doubted that I'd be lucky enough to actually be pregnant, so me going into the bathroom to pee on a stick was 99% just for fun. I peed on it and walked out before the results, and Thomas and Mark had surprised me with candles on one of our wedding pies! I blew out the candles and made a little wish, not realizing a lifetime of wishes had come true in the bathroom. I went back in there and two dark lines had appeared. Thomas said "that was a cheap test, maybe it's a mistake!" So I took two more tests, and immediately two red dark lines appeared on both...Tom's reaction? "So are we gonna watch a movie?" Haha, I'm pretty sure he was in shock and the idea of being a husband hadn't even sunk in, much less being a daddy. Mark immediately got teary-eyed but was in shock as well. I wanted to have my girl moment, so I called my best friend & cousin, Ashley Lee, and went in the bedroom to call her. We started crying together, and once Thomas heard the tears it became a lot more real, he ran into the bedroom and started crying and kissing me and my belly. By far the best weekend of my life.
So, the morning after I found out, I went to Rite-Aid, and bought a slightly more expensive test. I went with Mark to the store while Thomas finished up cleaning some wedding stuff. I made Mark stand by the door while I took the test into the bathroom-I couldn't wait to get home. So once that came up positive, we rushed back to Thomas, and said "it's time to spread the news" We ran to my mom and step-dad, Monty's house and gave them a present to say thank you for all the help with the wedding, they pulled out the pregnancy tests and we're shocked, but not so shocked at the same time. They knew we wanted babies soon, but the fact that everything happened all in one weekend was pretty shocking. Monty got teary eyed and mom stared at me for a few moments before she hugged me and said she was so happy! We took Thomas to work, and I called my step mom Heather next, and she screamed and cried and squealed with joy! Next Mark drove me to my sister's house. I handed her a box of tampons and said "I'm not going to be needing these for a while" she said "I sent those with you on your honeymoon, they aren't mine, you keep them!" I said "Andrea I didn't need them, and wont for a while." She said she didn't get it and giggled with confusion finally I said "I'm pregnant you dork!!" she was so happy and excited. I went in the house and told Timmy and Beckah, and they too were shocked and happy! When Thomas got home that night from work, we called his parents and when his mom answered the phone he said "Hey Grandma!" she said "This is your mom Diana, did you try calling grandma?" He ignored it and asked her how she was and what not, eventually he asked her to put the phone on speaker phone next to Dad, and he said "Hey mom, when I called you grandma, it wasn't a mistake, Amber and I are going to have a baby!" She said "Are you serious? you're not joking?" Once they realized we were serious the phone went silent. Thomas said "are you there?" Dad said "Your mom can't talk right now" Then we hear a little voice with tears behind it "You guys are just so great! I love you!" I think they were both prettttty excited! None the less we got some great reactions and everyone seems pretty happy about the baby's coming!
Week 6-It was back to work after all the wedding, birthday, and baby excitement. Due to facebook all my coworkers already knew. A couple of things I'd like to note about this week. Thomas and I picked out names [girl-Cambria Allynn Poeschel boy-Tucker Stanley Poeschel]. I began to get some serious pregnancy symptoms-sore boobs, fatigue, endless hunger, headaches, and I could feel a hard spot on my lower abdomen where the baby is.
Week 7-Hell. I was sooo sick. I was working everyday, and I got a sinus infection and some sort of flu, I was throwing up every half hour, and wanted to die. By Saturday, I had to leave work to go home because I hadn't kept liquids down for a few days.
Week 8-Flu was almost gone, but due to a cough I developed from the sinus infection, I threw out a rib, and it's been hard to breathe since. Frankly at this point, I hate being pregnant. I was miserable. I wanted the baby to be out of my belly and in my arms right then, There was no way I could do 32 more weeks of this.
Week 9-Thanksgiving week. I did get to enjoy thanksgiving, of course the next few days after that I was deathly sick. I throw up everyday, and need a nap around 3 everyday haha. My belly at this point has started to pop out and my hips have grown enough to make all my pants require that I unzip them all. My flu is gone, but my mood swings are in full swing...I hate everybody and everything. I've never been so mean in my whole life, and then the next second cry at how much I miss my mom, and then start busting up laughing because I spilled my soup on me. I feel ridiculous and not much like myself. Car rides are the worst, but I'm starting to find what foods at what time work best for me. I had to buy a new bra-my boobs are huge and swollen and sore, and new underwear-the elastic was too tight.
Week 10-here we are...all caught up. This week has been the best so far. I had my first appt with my midwife. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat, and learn so much about my body, the baby, and what's going to happen over the next 30 weeks. I'm a quarter of the way there and have so much to do! We've picked out the theme of baby stuff [winnie the pooh!], we've started looking into birthing classes, and changing my diet. My belly has continued to bump out a little, and I'm starting to feel my figure full out. But by far the best part of the week was hearing the baby's heartbeat on the doppler. I was so relieved. I was having a really hard time not knowing what was going on in my belly, and it was such a relief to know i've done something right! My HCG levels were good, and my uterus was growing at a good rate, and I've gained 3 pounds. I'm now 95 pounds!
So that's been the basics of the last 10 weeks. I am going to start a new blog tonight on things I've learned, things I'm planning, things I'm looking forward to, and some helpful advice for anyone seeking it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)