This will be a long blog full of great news...so again, I'll break this up in chapters.
"Come again, Doc?"-
Today is the 29th, I'm 23 weeks and 2 days along now. On the 22nd I went to my first doctor's appointment at Mercy OB. And let me take this moment to say they are fantastic. They are so nice, and my nurse, Mary, was sweet, informative, caring, and thorough. I was very pleased with my experience. But to the exciting part... At that doctors appointment I weighed 101! That's 9 pounds! My heart rate was good. Basically we discussed my placenta previa, and how we would go forward from there. I then asked if I could travel to Sacramento to watch my brother-in-law, Mark, graduate from college. She said she would order me a sonogram the next day so that we could re-evaluate the situation. So, basically she was telling me that if the placenta hadn't moved I wasn't going, so I made plans with family so that I wouldn't be stuck at home by myself while everyone was out celebrating. I had been told that the chances of the placenta moving are really one in a million that late into the pregnancy, and that if it was going to move at all it wouldn't do so until around 30-35 weeks. So, I went to my appointment the next day [the 23rd] anyways. They hooked me up to the ultrasound, and this time my husband got to be there. The sono tech wouldn't tell me anything, but she kept commenting on how active the baby was. I was told I have one of the most active babies they had seen in a while! I'm thinking that's good. I got ready to leave and I decided to ask the nurse if she thought the trip would be safe if I didn't do much walking and she said "You do not have placenta previa! Have safe travels!" "Wait...what? Are you sure?" I was positive that this was a dream. She was so non-chalant about it, I was sure there was a mistake. She said "Amber Reynolds, right? 10-23-92?" Haha, I started balling. I was trying to ask questions but couldn't get a sentence out without crying. This was the biggest miracle ever. I have had an army of people praying for me and the baby. God definitely conquered this. There is nothing scientific about this. Truly, this was the first time in my life where there was no doubt in my heart that God was on my side, and that my prayers were really being listened to. I always knew prayer worked...but to have 100% certainty of such was amazing. I felt like God personally tuned into my life and answered my biggest prayer of my life! It's so great to be touched by the Big Man. So we celebrated by going to Sacramento the next day. It wore me out, but it was great!
Off Bedrest-
So now I'm off bed rest, and the doctor called me today and told me the baby is measuring right on and they didn't find any abnormalities. So that's great! I do have some sort of minor infection though, but she believes it's caused by me not taking my Elmiron any more. She said it wasn't a big deal, so I didn't listen to the details much, just had her call in a prescription. It's not a UTI, but it's some sort of bacteria that my body is having trouble fighting. Being off bed rest has been great. I'm trying to work up my energy and muscle. Lying down 24/7 for almost two months does not do the body good. I get tired easily now, but I'm getting my house together! I am loving my new house, and we finally have the baby all set up. My life is getting back together. Getting my insurance worked out this week, and tomorrow I'm calling unemployment. I sure do miss work!
Cravings-
I eat cereal every day. Cheerios and Honey Bunches of Oats, especially. Taco Bell's taco supremes. Cranberry juice. Ice Cream. Cold things. Bland things. And of course mexican still.
Nursery-
We have been getting everything set up nicely. We decided to keep the crib broken down until we'll be using it. We have a bassinet I plan on using for a while. And I plan to co-sleep. I had ordered 3 more diapers a while ago, and they never came. I accepted that my great deal was too good to be true, and that I was scammed, but my in-laws showed up with them last weekend. It some how got shipped to their house instead of ours. So I now have 7 cloth diapers...slowly but surely building them up. My main things on my list of things we need before the baby gets here: Mini-washing machine, glider chair, more diapers, safety kits and first aid stuff, baby towels and bathroom stuff, a Moby wrap [or a more generic version haha], classic pooh crib set [of course that can probably wait], more clothes, a diaper pail or some sort of contraption for holding the dirty cloth diapers, newborn disposable diapers [we are doing disposable for the first 3 months or so], nursing bras, changing table pad, and the video baby monitor. While unpacking our new house, I've been finding all the pooh bear stuff I've been saving since I was a kid, and I'm excited to start setting things up. Also, I'll be starting all my little baby projects soon [wood letters, baby scrapbook, grocery cart cover, more bassinet sheets, tye dye onesies, ect.,...].
Milestones-
I think my only real milestone this week is that by the end of the week I'm considered a viable pregnancy! So everyday from here on out is hope!
This blog is to keep my memory fresh on my journey of being pregnant. It's also there to keep people updated on how we are doing, and to help anyone out there who might have some of the same struggles as me. I also want to reach out to all types of families and situations. I want to teach what I learn, and help moms everywhere!
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
I know it's been a while...20 week update.
Let me break this up in chapters.
My Apologies
Sorry to all of you who have been all but begging me to update my blog. I get really excited to hear that people are so into it, but then I leave you hanging! My last post was so poorly written, mostly because of the tears streaming down my face at the time of writing it, and I just wanted to get it done. So here I am 20 weeks pregnant, now. I haven't felt like writing about anything, because I guess since I almost lost the baby, nothing but my baby, my body, and my marriage seem merely important. Which is always true, but I guess I've just clammed up and other than my parents and my husband, I haven't really wanted to talk to much of anyone. Mostly because they want to talk about all the baby stuff, which sometimes I'm just not in the mood to deal with-I try not to get emotional infront of people. And also because everyone seems to have doctor advice from their school of "I've never had children, but I know everything, and I can be your own personal doctor" haha.
My Annoyances
I shouldn't be mean, because I truly do love input...when I ask for it. And also I'm sick of hearing everyone tell me the following:
"If you lose the baby it was just meant to be, trust that God has a plan"
-That is my least favorite, because I believe that 1. God's plan was for me to be pregnant, and for me to be a mom, and 2. I believe more than anything this baby has a purpose in the world, and I plan to do all I can to make sure the baby makes it here. I truly have no doubt in my heart that the attack on my health is not God related, but purely satan. My faith in God is what's getting me through this. So it's a nice thought, but please don't say this to me any more.
"If you're careful and do everything right, I'm sure the placenta will move"
Actually, in my case, it has nothing to do with me. I am to stay on bed rest to prevent bleeding of the placenta, other than that the placenta moving is a miracle up to God, and my chances are very slim. I've accepted this, and I wish everyone else would too.
and lastly, "The c-section is no big deal, most women would prefer it"
The part that I like to hear is that the c-section is no big deal, the part that annoys me is that most women would prefer it. If they do, that's great for them. But I seem to get no sympathy at my loss for experiencing birth. I feel like my biggest dream has been ripped away from me. Sure, I may get to try it again in my next pregnancy, but to be honest, I've been thinking seriously about making this my last pregnancy [future blog?]. So let's assume that this is my last pregnancy...then the one thing I've dreamt of my entire teen life is gone. I understand that all that matters is having my baby here and being a mother, and trust me-I'm not taking any of this for granted. But I am surely allowed to be sad that I don't get to go through this. I'm quite aware that not many people are "into" the type of birth that I was, but it was important to ME and I'm sad. Not to mention, I'm deathly afraid of needles, knifes, hospitals, doctors, and catheters. All of which I will soon be facing.
So back to my update I suppose...I'm doing ok. My husband has been fantastic. Sure our house is a disaster, but we've never been closer. Everyday he makes sure I'm full-all the time [makes for a very dirty kitchen], he makes sure I'm entertained [so far monopoly has become the ultimate war and leverage in the house], and he gives me so much love and support [what other man would let me read pregnancy books/sites to him, stop whatever he's doing to feel/watch the baby kick, and rub my feet without asking?]. Truly my husband has made everything easier, better, and fun. I'm so blessed to have him in my life. Is he perfect? No...but he's perfect for me in every way. I don't want to spend my time on much else besides hanging out with him, my best friend!
Also, the support of my mom has been amazing too. I text her ridiculous questions, I call her with every worry, and through all of this I've felt like I have a true friend, because I feel like she's the only one who can truly understand how I feel and what I fear. She lost a baby around 5 months of being pregnant, before my little brother was born. They tried for years to have a baby, and then they finally get pregnant, and they lose it. Just when they were ready to give up, my mom got pregnant again in 2002, with my perfect little brother, Colton, who is 10 years younger than me. If anyone understands my fears of losing a baby, and wanting nothing more than to make this happen, it's my mom. Though I lost a baby 3 years ago [to the day almost], this one seems so much different. Probably because I didn't know I was pregnant until a few days before I miscarried [though I had my suspicions, I just ignored it], but I really feel like this baby is meant to be here, and I have never felt the love and connection with anyone else in my life than I do with this baby in my belly. Every kick sends a tidal wave of love to my heart, and sometimes I feel like I'm going to explode. I would do anything and everything to protect this baby, and I plan on doing just that.
Doctors
Ok, here's a story for you. So I'm sure I mentioned in the last blog, but when I found out that I have placenta previa, I had to go to a regular doctor. A doctor that accepted mid-pregnancy patients at high risk with a complete previa...psh, ya. So, my mid-wife refers me to THE ONLY ONE named Nasise. His office is about 30 miles away, and I'd have to have my c-section at the hospital in Red Bluff [which typically is a nicer hospital any ways...so I didn't mind] I heard great things about this doctor, so I was really excited to meet up with him. I get in there and he really didn't give me much information on anything, but luckily I knew quite a bit about what was going on before I got there. And then I handed him the disability papers for him to send in and he refused to sign them. I almost lost the baby due to walking too much and working too hard causing the low lying placenta to bleed which can kill the baby, and this man told me to go back to work! He said my pregnancy is not a viable pregnancy until 28 weeks, and he would not do anything to prevent miscarriage until I'm viable. I was 19 weeks when I went into his office, a little longer and I would be viable, and he wouldn't help save my baby?! He said miscarriages are common and his office wont do anything to prevent them until 28 weeks. He made me feel like my baby didn't matter to him, but he's not the one that feels his little kicks in the morning, and he's not the one who spent years praying for and dreaming about this baby, so of course, he couldn't understand! So I went home and bawled for hours...actually an entire day and a half. I finally called my boss, [they replaced me as soon as my midwife put me on bed rest, because they needed someone in the office. I'm still employed, but not working, and I wont return until late this year when I'm ready to just be a fill in, I want to be a stay at home mom, but I wasn't ok with completely leaving my job that I love so much!] and she was super supportive on trying to figure out what to do. But here I am- jobless, on bed rest, but not official bed rest because frankly, my doctor was an asshole. So, I considered going back to work, but every instinct in me told me not to get off my couch. That even if I was going to miscarry anyways, I was going to make sure to do everything I can to prevent it. I was not going to be at fault for anything. So I called my boss, and she immediately told me not to come to work, to stay in bed, and we'll figure everything out. So the next day I spent hours calling doctors trying to find someone else that would take me. Finally I find Mercy OB Clinic that works through Dr. Perry. Who I also hear is fantastic. Oh wait...did I mention that while at the Dr. office of Nasise, I find out my insurance I've been using this whole time doesn't cover maternity? Grrrreat...so now I'm in the process of being signed up for medi-cal. Yay. So I have an appt at Mercy OB on the 22nd of this month. I'm praying she signs the disability papers so I can have some sort of income on my part. It's been rough financially, and anything would help at this point. Especially since I've been paying deductables out of pocket, and will have to back pay my midwife, since she doesn't accept medi cal and my insurance isn't going to give her anything. So here I am, in between doctors. Out of all this though, it's inspired me to want to become a midwife...maybe that's what I'll go to school for? Hmmm...
Nursery
In the last week or so we got the crib, dresser, and changing table from my step-mom's brother & wife. Such a blessing! It's the type of crib that turns into the toddler bed and then regular kid bed...and it's a pretty light wood, and they gave it to us for $50! Also, my friend Tenisha gave me a stroller and carseat that were brand new and totally cute. And I have my bassinet all ready to go with 3 sets of sheets that I made with my grandma. I've started buying the cloth diapers. I have 4 right now, and with our tax return we plan to buy a set of 24 online for about $100. We still have quite a bit to buy, but we are getting there! I also want to paint some wood letters to hang above the crib that spell out the baby's name. So I'll have to make a boy set and a girl set. =)
Cravings
Alright so here's some new cravings, and the things I can no longer stand.
I eat at least two popsicles a day...I love anything cold. I'm not a big fan of anything sweet, but if it's cold and sweet I like it. I hate chocolate now, which is sad...but I can eat chocolate ice cream still. The baby kicks like crazy every time I eat popsicles! Also mexican food is my primary life source. I could eat salsa and sour cream all day. [with tortillas of course!] The spicier the better! Peanut butter is now only good on pancakes and french toast...if I eat it by itself or on anything else it tastes like lettuce. I love extra mayonnaise on everything. Oh and I eat a turkey sandwich just about every day. Also, I can't seem to drink enough water. My water intake has quadrupled, seriously! I'm always thirsty! Smartwater and Great Value are some of the few that taste good to me though. Arrowhead is now disgusting [used to be my favorite].
Emotions
Besides the obvious stress of everything going on, I've been having some crazy emotional break downs over ridiculous things. Last night I cried because I folded an 18 month onesie. Me: "I can't believe our baby will be big enough to wear this! *starts crying*" Tom: "Yes, he will, and someday he'll ride a bike, and go to college, and get married, and make us grandparents, but for now let's make sure the crib is set up before you give birth to him, because, remember, Amber? You're still pregnant, the baby doesn't even fit into newborn clothes yet" Me: "I know, but it wont take long, then it's all over!" Tom: "Want a popsicle?" -yes, that really happened. haha. Sometimes I cry when I see babies, I'm not sure if it's a happy cry or a sad cry, I think it's just an overwhelming cry. I cry when I'm frustrated that I can't get my pillows just right. I cry when I feel bad for asking for another water bottle. I cry when Tom leaves for work. I cry when he gets home from work. I cry when the food he makes me tastes really good. I cry when it doesn't taste like I hoped. I cry when he brings me home gifts, and I cry when he rubs my feet without asking. Basically, I cry a lot. haha.
Also, I am always stressing about something. I hate not being able to do much, because if I could, this house would be spotless. I want to scrub walls and clean cupboards and organise wedding stuff, but I can't, and that's probably my biggest emotional confliction right now.
Milestones
I had to buy bigger underwear! Oh my goodness. I've worn 5s since I was 14 [extra smalls] and I went a bought smalls about a month ago, and now those are too tight, so I bought medium granny panties and the leg holes are huge and saggy but the belly part is tight...I feel huge! haha. Also, I bought some sports bras [that are supposed to be stretchy]. Before I got pregnant I wore either a 32C or a 34B, I bought a 36C and it's tight! My boobs are veiny and tight and sore and leaking, and I have to say, I am starting to come to terms with the fact that they will never be the same. Sad day. I hope my husband enjoyed them while they lasted. My belly button..."wait, what belly button?"...exactly. It's gone. Poof. I look like those mannequins at the mall that are missing vital human features...like, I don't know, a freaking belly button! haha. My wedding ring is getting tighter...which is actually a good thing. My ring would only size down to a 3, and it was still loose, so it's good that my fingers are getting fatter. I do bump into things now with my belly, and when I look down I can only see the tips of my toes, and when I brush my teeth in the shower, I can't just spit straight down because it hits my belly, sort of like when my grandpa spills when he eats-I have spots on my shirts where I drop food now! haha. And lastly, I'm officially up to an average of 3 naps a day. Even while I'm on bed rest, I get so wore out. So to all you working pregnant mammas-I salute you!
I suppose that's it. Keep an eye out the next few days for blogs about c-sections, bed rest, church support, decisions as a parent that you shouldn't back down on, and a few others. I am excited to be back to writing! Keep me and baby in your prayers please. We are doing good right now, but I've accepted that anything can happen. Thanks for reading everyone!
My Apologies
Sorry to all of you who have been all but begging me to update my blog. I get really excited to hear that people are so into it, but then I leave you hanging! My last post was so poorly written, mostly because of the tears streaming down my face at the time of writing it, and I just wanted to get it done. So here I am 20 weeks pregnant, now. I haven't felt like writing about anything, because I guess since I almost lost the baby, nothing but my baby, my body, and my marriage seem merely important. Which is always true, but I guess I've just clammed up and other than my parents and my husband, I haven't really wanted to talk to much of anyone. Mostly because they want to talk about all the baby stuff, which sometimes I'm just not in the mood to deal with-I try not to get emotional infront of people. And also because everyone seems to have doctor advice from their school of "I've never had children, but I know everything, and I can be your own personal doctor" haha.
My Annoyances
I shouldn't be mean, because I truly do love input...when I ask for it. And also I'm sick of hearing everyone tell me the following:
"If you lose the baby it was just meant to be, trust that God has a plan"
-That is my least favorite, because I believe that 1. God's plan was for me to be pregnant, and for me to be a mom, and 2. I believe more than anything this baby has a purpose in the world, and I plan to do all I can to make sure the baby makes it here. I truly have no doubt in my heart that the attack on my health is not God related, but purely satan. My faith in God is what's getting me through this. So it's a nice thought, but please don't say this to me any more.
"If you're careful and do everything right, I'm sure the placenta will move"
Actually, in my case, it has nothing to do with me. I am to stay on bed rest to prevent bleeding of the placenta, other than that the placenta moving is a miracle up to God, and my chances are very slim. I've accepted this, and I wish everyone else would too.
and lastly, "The c-section is no big deal, most women would prefer it"
The part that I like to hear is that the c-section is no big deal, the part that annoys me is that most women would prefer it. If they do, that's great for them. But I seem to get no sympathy at my loss for experiencing birth. I feel like my biggest dream has been ripped away from me. Sure, I may get to try it again in my next pregnancy, but to be honest, I've been thinking seriously about making this my last pregnancy [future blog?]. So let's assume that this is my last pregnancy...then the one thing I've dreamt of my entire teen life is gone. I understand that all that matters is having my baby here and being a mother, and trust me-I'm not taking any of this for granted. But I am surely allowed to be sad that I don't get to go through this. I'm quite aware that not many people are "into" the type of birth that I was, but it was important to ME and I'm sad. Not to mention, I'm deathly afraid of needles, knifes, hospitals, doctors, and catheters. All of which I will soon be facing.
So back to my update I suppose...I'm doing ok. My husband has been fantastic. Sure our house is a disaster, but we've never been closer. Everyday he makes sure I'm full-all the time [makes for a very dirty kitchen], he makes sure I'm entertained [so far monopoly has become the ultimate war and leverage in the house], and he gives me so much love and support [what other man would let me read pregnancy books/sites to him, stop whatever he's doing to feel/watch the baby kick, and rub my feet without asking?]. Truly my husband has made everything easier, better, and fun. I'm so blessed to have him in my life. Is he perfect? No...but he's perfect for me in every way. I don't want to spend my time on much else besides hanging out with him, my best friend!
Also, the support of my mom has been amazing too. I text her ridiculous questions, I call her with every worry, and through all of this I've felt like I have a true friend, because I feel like she's the only one who can truly understand how I feel and what I fear. She lost a baby around 5 months of being pregnant, before my little brother was born. They tried for years to have a baby, and then they finally get pregnant, and they lose it. Just when they were ready to give up, my mom got pregnant again in 2002, with my perfect little brother, Colton, who is 10 years younger than me. If anyone understands my fears of losing a baby, and wanting nothing more than to make this happen, it's my mom. Though I lost a baby 3 years ago [to the day almost], this one seems so much different. Probably because I didn't know I was pregnant until a few days before I miscarried [though I had my suspicions, I just ignored it], but I really feel like this baby is meant to be here, and I have never felt the love and connection with anyone else in my life than I do with this baby in my belly. Every kick sends a tidal wave of love to my heart, and sometimes I feel like I'm going to explode. I would do anything and everything to protect this baby, and I plan on doing just that.
Doctors
Ok, here's a story for you. So I'm sure I mentioned in the last blog, but when I found out that I have placenta previa, I had to go to a regular doctor. A doctor that accepted mid-pregnancy patients at high risk with a complete previa...psh, ya. So, my mid-wife refers me to THE ONLY ONE named Nasise. His office is about 30 miles away, and I'd have to have my c-section at the hospital in Red Bluff [which typically is a nicer hospital any ways...so I didn't mind] I heard great things about this doctor, so I was really excited to meet up with him. I get in there and he really didn't give me much information on anything, but luckily I knew quite a bit about what was going on before I got there. And then I handed him the disability papers for him to send in and he refused to sign them. I almost lost the baby due to walking too much and working too hard causing the low lying placenta to bleed which can kill the baby, and this man told me to go back to work! He said my pregnancy is not a viable pregnancy until 28 weeks, and he would not do anything to prevent miscarriage until I'm viable. I was 19 weeks when I went into his office, a little longer and I would be viable, and he wouldn't help save my baby?! He said miscarriages are common and his office wont do anything to prevent them until 28 weeks. He made me feel like my baby didn't matter to him, but he's not the one that feels his little kicks in the morning, and he's not the one who spent years praying for and dreaming about this baby, so of course, he couldn't understand! So I went home and bawled for hours...actually an entire day and a half. I finally called my boss, [they replaced me as soon as my midwife put me on bed rest, because they needed someone in the office. I'm still employed, but not working, and I wont return until late this year when I'm ready to just be a fill in, I want to be a stay at home mom, but I wasn't ok with completely leaving my job that I love so much!] and she was super supportive on trying to figure out what to do. But here I am- jobless, on bed rest, but not official bed rest because frankly, my doctor was an asshole. So, I considered going back to work, but every instinct in me told me not to get off my couch. That even if I was going to miscarry anyways, I was going to make sure to do everything I can to prevent it. I was not going to be at fault for anything. So I called my boss, and she immediately told me not to come to work, to stay in bed, and we'll figure everything out. So the next day I spent hours calling doctors trying to find someone else that would take me. Finally I find Mercy OB Clinic that works through Dr. Perry. Who I also hear is fantastic. Oh wait...did I mention that while at the Dr. office of Nasise, I find out my insurance I've been using this whole time doesn't cover maternity? Grrrreat...so now I'm in the process of being signed up for medi-cal. Yay. So I have an appt at Mercy OB on the 22nd of this month. I'm praying she signs the disability papers so I can have some sort of income on my part. It's been rough financially, and anything would help at this point. Especially since I've been paying deductables out of pocket, and will have to back pay my midwife, since she doesn't accept medi cal and my insurance isn't going to give her anything. So here I am, in between doctors. Out of all this though, it's inspired me to want to become a midwife...maybe that's what I'll go to school for? Hmmm...
Nursery
In the last week or so we got the crib, dresser, and changing table from my step-mom's brother & wife. Such a blessing! It's the type of crib that turns into the toddler bed and then regular kid bed...and it's a pretty light wood, and they gave it to us for $50! Also, my friend Tenisha gave me a stroller and carseat that were brand new and totally cute. And I have my bassinet all ready to go with 3 sets of sheets that I made with my grandma. I've started buying the cloth diapers. I have 4 right now, and with our tax return we plan to buy a set of 24 online for about $100. We still have quite a bit to buy, but we are getting there! I also want to paint some wood letters to hang above the crib that spell out the baby's name. So I'll have to make a boy set and a girl set. =)
Cravings
Alright so here's some new cravings, and the things I can no longer stand.
I eat at least two popsicles a day...I love anything cold. I'm not a big fan of anything sweet, but if it's cold and sweet I like it. I hate chocolate now, which is sad...but I can eat chocolate ice cream still. The baby kicks like crazy every time I eat popsicles! Also mexican food is my primary life source. I could eat salsa and sour cream all day. [with tortillas of course!] The spicier the better! Peanut butter is now only good on pancakes and french toast...if I eat it by itself or on anything else it tastes like lettuce. I love extra mayonnaise on everything. Oh and I eat a turkey sandwich just about every day. Also, I can't seem to drink enough water. My water intake has quadrupled, seriously! I'm always thirsty! Smartwater and Great Value are some of the few that taste good to me though. Arrowhead is now disgusting [used to be my favorite].
Emotions
Besides the obvious stress of everything going on, I've been having some crazy emotional break downs over ridiculous things. Last night I cried because I folded an 18 month onesie. Me: "I can't believe our baby will be big enough to wear this! *starts crying*" Tom: "Yes, he will, and someday he'll ride a bike, and go to college, and get married, and make us grandparents, but for now let's make sure the crib is set up before you give birth to him, because, remember, Amber? You're still pregnant, the baby doesn't even fit into newborn clothes yet" Me: "I know, but it wont take long, then it's all over!" Tom: "Want a popsicle?" -yes, that really happened. haha. Sometimes I cry when I see babies, I'm not sure if it's a happy cry or a sad cry, I think it's just an overwhelming cry. I cry when I'm frustrated that I can't get my pillows just right. I cry when I feel bad for asking for another water bottle. I cry when Tom leaves for work. I cry when he gets home from work. I cry when the food he makes me tastes really good. I cry when it doesn't taste like I hoped. I cry when he brings me home gifts, and I cry when he rubs my feet without asking. Basically, I cry a lot. haha.
Also, I am always stressing about something. I hate not being able to do much, because if I could, this house would be spotless. I want to scrub walls and clean cupboards and organise wedding stuff, but I can't, and that's probably my biggest emotional confliction right now.
Milestones
I had to buy bigger underwear! Oh my goodness. I've worn 5s since I was 14 [extra smalls] and I went a bought smalls about a month ago, and now those are too tight, so I bought medium granny panties and the leg holes are huge and saggy but the belly part is tight...I feel huge! haha. Also, I bought some sports bras [that are supposed to be stretchy]. Before I got pregnant I wore either a 32C or a 34B, I bought a 36C and it's tight! My boobs are veiny and tight and sore and leaking, and I have to say, I am starting to come to terms with the fact that they will never be the same. Sad day. I hope my husband enjoyed them while they lasted. My belly button..."wait, what belly button?"...exactly. It's gone. Poof. I look like those mannequins at the mall that are missing vital human features...like, I don't know, a freaking belly button! haha. My wedding ring is getting tighter...which is actually a good thing. My ring would only size down to a 3, and it was still loose, so it's good that my fingers are getting fatter. I do bump into things now with my belly, and when I look down I can only see the tips of my toes, and when I brush my teeth in the shower, I can't just spit straight down because it hits my belly, sort of like when my grandpa spills when he eats-I have spots on my shirts where I drop food now! haha. And lastly, I'm officially up to an average of 3 naps a day. Even while I'm on bed rest, I get so wore out. So to all you working pregnant mammas-I salute you!
I suppose that's it. Keep an eye out the next few days for blogs about c-sections, bed rest, church support, decisions as a parent that you shouldn't back down on, and a few others. I am excited to be back to writing! Keep me and baby in your prayers please. We are doing good right now, but I've accepted that anything can happen. Thanks for reading everyone!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)